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"There's an empty spot I've always had inside me. I tried to fill it with family, religion, community service, but those were dead ends! I think this chair is the answer."

"Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover."

"Warning signs that lover is bored: 1. Passionless kisses 2. Frequent sighing 3. Moved, left no forwarding address."

"Aren't we forgeting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa."

"Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!"

"When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!"

"The artist must create a spark before he can make a fire and before art is born, the artist must be ready to be consumed by the fire of his own creation."

"Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton."

"Art washes away from the soul, the dust of everyday living."

"I opened the window and my heart. The sun flooded my house and love flooded my soul."

"Happy is he who has laid up in his youth, and held fast in all fortune, a genuine and passionate love of reading."

"Too many people miss the silver lining because they're expecting gold."