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"I'm NOT short. I prefer to think there is simply more space above my head for word balloons full of devastatingly pithy witticisms."

"Why is it OK to love without a reason, but anger requires justification?"

"Don't get yourself arrested and make your day worse! If you need to vent, just smash something that's already broken! You can't get in trouble for wrecking the unsalvageable!"

"The only good ideas are the ones I can take credit for."

"To give money is an easy matter and in any man's power. But to decide to whom to give it, and how large and when, and for what purpose and how, is neither in everyman's power nor an easy matter."

"It's not having what you want It's wanting what you've got."

"There is an art, or, rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."

"No matter how much the cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens."

"I am at two with nature."

"Life is like getting dropped off in the middle of the woods, and then year by year, gradually walking home."