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"Perseverance and audacity generally win."

"Anarchy - it's not the law, it's just a good idea."

"Solutions are not the answer."

"The only way to reform some people is to chloroform them."

"'We are survival machines - robot vehicles blindly programmed to preserve the selfish molecules known as genes."

"Television is a medium of entertainment which permits millions of people to listen to the same joke at the same time, and yet remain lonesome."

"Culture is an instrument wielded by professors to manufacture professors who when their turn comes, will manufacture professors."

"Live dangerously and you live right."

"If thee marries for money, thee surely will earn it."

"We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart."

"If I was more complacent and I let things slide, my life would be easier, but you all wouldn't be as entertained. My misery is your pleasure."

"Perhaps better we not obscure the idea that happiness and misery, kindness and greed, and good works and bad deeds are within the capacities of us all, not merely a select few."