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"Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time."

"There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot."

"Today I met with a subliminal advertising executive for just a second."

"You know how it is when you go to be the subject of a psychology experiment, and nobody else shows up, and you think maybe that's part of the experiment? I'm like that all the time."

"I hate it when my foot falls asleep during the day because that means it's going to be up all night."

"It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature."

"When you give up drinking, you have to deal with that wonderful personality that started you drinking in the first place."

"More appealing than knowledge itself is the feeling of knowledge."

"I know a mother-in-law who sleeps with her glasses on, the better to see her son-in-law suffer in her dreams."

"Whenever we attain a higher vision, the lower vision disappears of itself."

"The young man who has not wept is a savage, and the old man who will not laugh is a fool."

"The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets and to steal bread."