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"Almost all absurdity of conduct arises from the imitation of those whom we cannot resemble."

"Jargon allows us to camouflage intellectual poverty with verbal extravagance."

"Your true value depends entirely on what you are compared with."

"I think it's about time we voted for senators with breasts. After all, we've been voting for boobs long enough."

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."

"I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought: What the hell good would that do?"

"Golden lads and girls all must, as chimney-sweepers come to dust."

"When kings the sword of justice first lay down; They art no kings, though they posess the crown; Titles are shadows, crowns are empty things, The good of subjects is the end of kings."

"A kiss can be a comma, a question mark, or an exclamation point. That's the basic spelling that every woman ought to know."

"Ridicule is generally made use of to laugh men out of virtue and good sense, by attacking everything praiseworthy in human life."