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"EPAULET, n. An ornamented badge, serving to distinguish a military officer from the enemy -- that is to say, from the officer of lower rank to whom his death would give promotion."

"A reasonable probability is the only certainty."

"I was eyes to the blind, and feet was I to the lame."

"What men call gallantry and gods adultery Is much more common where the climate's sultry."

"I used to wake up at 4 A.M. and start sneezing, sometimes for five hours. I tried to find out what sort of allergy I had but finally came to the conclusion that it must be an allergy to consciousness."

"Man is born free and everywhere he is in chains."

"If happiness truly consisted of physical ease and freedom from care, then the happiest individual would not be either a man or a woman; it would be, I think, an American cow."

"If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants."

"All flesh is grass."

"'When angry, count four; when very angry, swear."